At a wedding I went to on the weekend, one of the things that really struck me, apart from what a lovely day it was generally. Was how nice the speeches were. In particular the father of the Brides speech, though starting off life an episode of “This is your Life“, turned into a really lovely statement on the pride he had in his daughter and how happy he was that she’d found someone as nice as the groom.
The reason I mention this, is that quite often at weddings, there’s a bit of trepidation surrounding the speeches. Will they be funny?, will they be rude?, will they be emotional? I think one of the issues when writing a wedding speech is realising the range of audience you’ll be talking to. So for example, if you’re the best man, and you’ve known the groom since you were at school, you may be tempted to create quite an embarrassing speech, giving up all the details on things that his new bride or family didn’t know about him. This may make you laugh, but the problem with a speech like this is that it would probably alienate a large section of the audience, and only be really funny to you and a few of his friends. Likewise a father of the bride speech, could focus too much on the bride without mention of the groom or his family. Not really something you want to happen.
So we thought it would be a good idea, to create a list of some pointers for budding speech writers. Whether you’re suffering from writers block and don’t know how to begin your speech, or to just double check that no-one will walk out in disgust at the secrets you divulge.
- When you plan your speech, be sure to structure it in a way that makes sense and flows. So it’s a good idea to break it down into sections, such as thank you’s, how you know the bride and groom, stories about one/the other/or both of them and then a toast at the end.
- As already mentioned it’s important to speak to both sides in your speech. Not everyone will know the references or even you, so any stories that you do tell make sure that you explain their back story clearly so everyone understands.
- Before your speech, it can be a nervous time. You may feel tense and not enjoy public speaking, but remember that this is a celebration; no one is there to criticise you. Everyone is there to have a good time so just relax, and if you’re worried about getting the order of your speech wrong, I’d always advise bringing along some form of notes or cue cards to help you remember the order of your speech.
- When you finally give you speech, make sure that you make eye contact, with people all around the room, as there’s nothing worse than someone constantly looking down at their notes, as that’s not really giving a speech, but more reading. If you’re nervous about your speech, making eye contact with someone you know can really help calm you down and help settle the nerves.
- It’s always a good idea to end the speech with a toast to the bride and groom. It makes it clear that the speech is over and also when writing your speech, gives you somewhere to get to, rather than feeling that you need to keep talking so much so that you end up rambling. As a guide a good speech needn’t be any more than five minutes long.
So there you have it. These few tips should be enough to get you started when writing your speech. The rest is up to you. Just remember to relax and enjoy it, and don’t make it too rude!
